PTSD – nirrvanablog

Solider in the Dark

Posted on December 20, 2015December 20, 2015 by NirrvanasPoems

Misunderstood.
They think I’m just sad.
They don’t understand
what happened with my dad.

A betrayal of trust;
A darkening of youth
Perspective forever changed
at the entombment of truth.

In the end, I escaped
And, oh, you did too!
If the truth was spoken aloud
now
What would you do?

Would you cower in the dark;
afraid to go outside?
Would you learn what it’s like
to always want to hide?

Don’t you ever forget me,
I’m the one that you harmed.
I’m a solider in the dark.
but don’t forget, I’m armed.

**Photo Credit “Soliders in the Dark~ Peace On Earth What Is It Worth 2012 Part Three ~.” 2012. Web. 20 Dec. 2015.

Stay Afloat

Posted on November 30, 2015December 10, 2015 by NirrvanasPoems

I am a survivor!
The past cannot
pull me under to drown
me in a current of pain and memories.
I stay
afloat,
buoyant and unsinkable.

*This poem was for the second phase of a contest where the prompt was to use a previous entry, found here:

https://nirrvanablog.wordpress.com/2015/11/23/survivor-contest-entry-prompt-you-have-6-words-to-tell-your-story/)

to create a new poem. The directions were to use all 6 words plus the 1 word title (bold them) and create a new short poem. To add in some fun, if you also read the italicized words (last word of each line) it creates a 3rd poem.

Agonized

Posted on November 26, 2015December 10, 2015 by NirrvanasPoems

No matter how hard I tried
I still feel empty inside.
I have never striven so hard
To not show how deeply I’m scarred.
Still it never seems enough!
I’m frail and scared, not tough.
Why can’t I ever feel free?
This is my everlasting plea
Let me be me, no apologies
for what I am, damaged, full of pathologies.

Thirty-Six Years –Picture Prompt contest entry

Posted on November 23, 2015December 10, 2015 by NirrvanasPoems

For thirty-six years I kept your secret
It formed a void
A cold hard place in my soul
I loved you though so I endured it.

For thirty-six years I pretended not to see
What you’d done to me
With your selfish needs and desires
Your uncaring spirit burned me alive.

For thirty-six years I struggled
To keep my head above water
No one understood except you
Yet you left me alone, scared and scarred.

For thirty-six years I pretended
I didn’t understand why you ran
I blamed myself and everyone around me
I punished them because I could not punish you.

No more! Your secret is told,
Shouted to the Heavens for all who will listen
I will heal and be whole again
You will rot in hell with no secrets left to tell.